* frog for Lonely Hearts
MADHATTERS is happy to announce a NEW SERVICE for our readers
Cœurs Solitaires is a service open, both to a Lady wishing to acommodate a new male member into her fold, and to a Gentleman seeking to widen the rings of his Lady friends.
Why not avail yourself of this FREE service and submit your own request for a bonk.
Please note that all the announcements carry a reference code. This should be quoted in replies or referred to in comments.
MH1 CELIBATE BUT SELF-ABUSING MONK seeks sympathetic woman to help him beat his habit.
MH2 HOT COUGAR (83) stunningly beautiful, with super-sexy-to-die-for body, searches visually-impaired toyboy.
MH3 CONFUSED straight male seeks heterosexual relationship with member of same sex – or not. Oh, forget it !
MH4 CHIP SHOP OWNER would like to meet battered housewife.
MH5 LOOKING FOR A NICE BIT OF SKIRT ? Then look no further. Also special offer on Lamb chops – Bowen & Grisawle, Butchers.
MH6 DOG LOVEING ROMANTIC desires to meet fair lady to join with him in romantic evening strolls. Those which are bathed in the soft, mellow light of a golden setting sun and with the sound of warm summer breezes whispering, playfully, amongst the leaves of weeping willows. The serene tranquility broken, but momentarily, by the dog taking a shit. The dirty bastard.
MH7 SENIOR CIVIL SERVANT seeks person of female gender. Must have cross-functional experience to play a key role in the effective integration of both parties and a strength to negate possible complex points of issue arising from said relationship.
MH8 ELDERLY CORNISHMAN lookin’ fer un ol’ maid wid them thar ‘uge knocker thingies. True, Oy maybe geddin’ on a bit but Oy still ‘ave bawth me oars in the wadder an’ Oy can still “plough a furrow”, iffen ‘ee get me meanin’, hee-hee-hee-har-har, wheeze, an’ . . . Bugger, where wuz Oy ?
MH9 FREE DILDO Batteries gone flat. No charge.
MH10 LADY mid 20’s, seeks underwear taken from her washing line in the early hours of Sunday morning.
MH11 YOUNG WOMAN recently lost virginity. Reward.
MH12 MECHANIC Have Hot Rod. Will travel.
MH13 LAY PREACHER seeks woman of questionable virtue for the laying on of hands. Yers ! Allelujah. Praise the Lord.
MH14 BINGE-DRINKER wants strong woman for support. Friday and Saturday nights only.
MH15 DOMINATRIX looking for a pathetic excuse of a man.Yes, that’s YOU !
MH16 HUNT MASTER searches Foxy Lady. Must be chaste.
MH17 SINGLE MAN 40’s, sensitive, withdrawn, wishes to meet lady of similar tender disposition for a back-scuttler, knee-trembler, blow job – you name it – Phwoar !
